© Rick Lohmeyer, 2011 301-404-2630
Romance and Dating Scams
On a dating site or social network you meet someone who
seems perfect. You email, IM, maybe even talk on the phone.
They declare their love and you make plans. Then they have
financial troubles and need help. A relative is sick, or they are
sick, they can’t get a visa to visit. Whatever the cause- if they
want money it’s a scam.
Romance and Dating Scams:
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Dating scammers break your heart and rip you off
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They try to get you off the dating site to email or phone
or IM (where you have less protection)
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The profess strong feelings after a few contacts
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They may take months or years to gain your trust
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They tell you a story and ask for money or gifts
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If you don’t send money they become desperate
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Their emails may be poorly written or ungrammatical
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Always talk to a friend before sending money or gifts
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Do not give out your credit or account information
She has many names,
but it’s the same scam.
Be very cautious with
someone outside your
area or country.
Protect Yourself from Romance and Dating Scams
Dating and Romance Scam Red Flags
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Someone who is too good to be true.
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The person contacts you first.
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Someone asks for your personal email or phone number on first contact.
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After contacting you they fall in love immediately and want to be in touch constantly.
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The person you are in contact with will not agree to use a webcam.
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Someone who claims to be American, but is overseas or in another country.
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The person will not send additional photos of themselves.
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Gorgeous professional photos with a vague profile almost always mean trouble.
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Any woman who talks about loving sex and experimenting in bed is not for real, unless
you are on Fetlife or AFF.
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They want to know everything about you, but don’t give info about themselves.
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Any man who talks about being a millionaire isn't for real.
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Someone who wants to come meet you but needs money for any purpose.
Protecting Yourself
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Both men and women, young and elderly fall for romance scams.
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NEVER SEND MONEY TO ANYONE YOU MEET ONLINE.
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Before sending money, consult a trusted friend and consider doing a basic background
check on the person first.
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Be the one always initiating communication via online dating services.
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First of all, do NOT give your personal or financial information to anyone you have met
through an online dating or personals site. Secondly, do NOT send anyone who you
met on the internet any of your hard earned money.
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Stay in the online dating site for all communications. Good sites have technical
expertise and security that will enable them to determine if the member with whom you
are corresponding is legitimate or not.
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Guard your privacy. Do not talk about money or give your personal financial
information to anyone on a dating site. Don’t give out your address
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Communicate with people locally, not overseas.
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Go slowly and carefully and don’t believe it when someone falls in love overnight.
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Never reply to communications from someone who sends you a note and immediately
includes their email address for you to continue the communication.
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Listen to your gut! If something feels wrong, it probably is. I would recommend ending
any relationship where you don’t feel safe or you feel like you’re being lied to.
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If you’re not ready to end a relationship just because things don’t feel right at the very
least take things extremely slow. Exercise extra caution and patience. Time may
reveal why your gut was telling you something wasn’t right.
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Beware of telephone scams that ask you to call long distance numbers which can end
up costing you a fortune.
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Beware of someone who has a sudden emergency, personally or in their family, and
needs you to give them a small loan.
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Average loss to romance scams is about $3,000. That is not small change.
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Beware of someone who wants to visit you, but needs financial help to do so.
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If you believe you might be scammed, contact the dating service for help.
Online Fraud